Choices and Chances
by ChryedLover
Summary: Christian is given the chance for a new life.. Will he make the right choice? Love will prevail! Please rate and review! Thank you xxx
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Just a new fanfic to get me back into writing! Hope you like it!! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the show!! (I wish I did)**

**Dedicated: To the amazing WFCTGIO thread!! I couldn't make it through without you Chryedians there!!! Much love!!**

**Finally: Please review!! I love reading them and it helps me improve too!! Be honest in your thoughts :p **

**Love CC xx**

Turning the collars of my jacket up, and digging my hands further into my jacket, I hurry across the Square eager to get out of the biting cold and home. I hear laughter and look up. Syed's arm is draped around Amira and he pulls her closer into him, against the wind. Anger rises up in me as they stop for a kiss.

My pace quickens as I try to ignore them. I've always felt sorry for him but I could sense that it was rapidly changing. The pity was being replaced with something else and I couldn't determine what it was. I looked at him from the corner of my eye as he whispered into her ear. I forced the bile down, conscious of the hard lines setting in my face.

I caught his eye and his face changed. The echo of the laughter lines which were etched on his face faded away and his eyes fluttered, panicked. I scoffed to myself and crossed the road before letting myself into my flat. I slammed the door shut, hard. My feet pounded the stairs as I tried to put as much distance between us as I possibly could. I let myself into my flat. I hated this. The fact that he got the perfect life and I had nothing, no one.

"_I was beginning to think you would never show" _

I spun on the spot and I stared at James. My eyes widened.

"_What the hell are you doing here?"_

"_Is that any way to greet your oldest friend"?_

"_How did you get in"?_

He smiled as he handed me a glass of wine.

"_I have your spare keys, remember"?_

"_What are you doing here? Last time I saw you, you told me not to contact you again" _

"_Things have changed" _

"_Like what?"_ I bought the wine to my lips as I awaited his reply.

To my surprise, James didn't answer, instead unbuttoned my jacket. As he slipped it off, I could tell that something wasn't right.

"_James, what's going on?"_

"_I love you Christian"_

"_Sorry?"_ I clutched the chair for support.

"_I mean it Christian. I still love you"_

"_Why now"?_

"_What?"_

"_You've had all this time to come back, why now?" _

"_Because no one measures up to you and I want to be with you properly"_

"_James.." _

"_You're single aren't you"?_

"_Yeah but"_

"_Do you love me"?_

"_You know I love you"_

"_Do you love me like a boyfriend"?_

"_James what is this"?_

"_What do you mean"?_

"_You've just walked back into my life and expect us to pick up from where we left off. Its not that simple"_

"_Why not?"_

I didn't answer. Realisation dawned onto his face.

"_You're still not hung up on that guy are you"?_

I breathed deeply.

"_Oh Christian! Are you SERIOUSLY hung up on some guy you can't have? You could turn any straight guy, gay."_

I laughed.

"_I hardly think so"_

"_Look"._ James stepped closer to me, as he ran his hand down my arm_. "I know I'm not this guy but I can be your best friend, the guy you know that will never leave you.. But at least give us a chance"._

My mind whizzed. I couldn't believe this. James was giving me my break out. My chance to really get over Syed. He stepped closer to me.

"_Tell me what you're thinking. Let me inside your head Christian, please"._

"_I'm thinking… that this is completely out of the blue and how can I be sure its real" _

His face coloured as I turned away from him and walked over to the window.

"_Christian I've never loved anyone quite like I love you"_

He walked towards me, his hand partially behind his back.

"_Yes, I love you. I want you to move to Surrey with me" _

My face dropped at his words. Move away? From here? Away from him?

"_I might not be this other guy, but I'll never leave your side, I'll always be there for you. I want to wake up next to you every single day. I want to be able to call you my own"_

"_Why now? But you're not him"_ My voice came out in little more than a whisper.

"_I know Christian, I know". _He ran his hand down the side of my face and I closed my eyes from his touch.

"_I might not be him, and you might not love me the way you love him, but give us time and we'll work Christian. Just if you love me, in any way then that's enough because I'll love us both enough"_

"_I don't know" _James was handing me the perfect life on a plate.

My eyes opened to find James on one knee in front of me.

"_I love you Christian Clarke. Will you marry me"?_


	2. Chapter 2 The Choice Is Made

I looked at him properly, really seeing him this time. His brown hair was cropped short, giving him an edgier look. The blue shirt didn't flatter his physique and the faded skinny jeans displayed his legs. But this was James. What you see is what you get. But could I do this to him? To myself? To Sy?

"_I – I don't know if I'll ever get over him" _I spoke finally.

"_That's fine Christian. Me and you, we work. You know we do" _

"_But I'm still not su-"_

"_Christian. Look at me"._ He took my face in his hands, my eyes gazing at the innocence of him. " _I love you" _His words were slow, deliberate. "_And that's all that matters". _

His hands never left my face as his face drew near. I fought the urge to recoil. I thought of Syed. His eyes were now closed. My feet couldn't move. I needed to move on. I could only see his eyelids. I deserved happiness. His lips met mine, with a soft touch. He probed my mouth open.

An image of Syed and I flashed through my mind, imprinting me. I had my arms wrapped around Syed's naked waist, my chin resting on his shoulder. My hands were stroking his stomach, as Syed's titled head was gently resting in the crevice of my neck. His dripping wet hair tickled my neck. His smile was broad and even though his eyes were shut, lost in the moment, I could see his illuminated face. I'd turned my head, kissed his jaw line, my eyes never leaving the mirror. His eyes had opened, instantly connecting mine. Consciously, I'd taken a snapshot of the moment. The look of love he had given me, had never left me. The words he said, now ran through my blood. It'd gone straight to my heart and was locked away so tightly, I knew if I ever erased it from my system, it would break my soul.

My eyes flashed open, the situation startling me. James had me half undressed on the bed. I rolled away.

"_James – just stop it please"_

"_What"?_ I tried to ignore the look of hurt on his face as he stabled his breathing.

"_I haven't said yes. I don't – know"_ I buttoned up my shirt.

"_Is that your answer"?_

I thought for a few moments before eventually speaking.

"_James IF I said yes, there would be things you had to know"_

"_Like what" _

"_Like the fact that I am still very much in love with this other guy"_ I put my hand up as James went to interrupt me. _"Please let me finish. _

James nodded and I gestured towards the sofa, my mind trying to work out exactly how much he had to know.

"_Like the fact that I need my time and space to get over him. You can't pressure me but I can't guarantee I'll ever get over him"._

Neither of us spoke. I had to be honest with him. It was a strictly need to know basis, but I didn't want to ruin this. James was my safety blanket and I knew that he would never hurt me the way Syed did. Maybe what I needed was someone calm, reassuring. Someone who knew exactly where they stood.

"_That's fine" _

His words pulled my out of my daze.

"_Sorry"?_

"_That's fine. I know we'll work"._

I pulled away from his advances.

"_But I'm damaged goods" _

"_I'll fix you.. I can't promise that but I can damn well try". _

"_There's just one more thing"._

"_What's that"?_

"_I can't move to Surrey"_

He froze.

"_I just – can't. James my life is here in Walford. It belongs with my friends and family. I have a job I enjoy. I need to be here for my sister, my Goddaughter, Roxy… I can't just up and leave with you"_

"_You've done it many times before.. He's here isn't he"?_

"_He is… But I'm just too old James. I'm nearly 40. I can't be expected to settle my life somewhere else. You know everyone here too and you could easily get a job. We're both familiar with this place, why move when it makes sense to stay"?_

I watched him as he slunk back on the sofa, head resting on hands.

"_Why do I have to make all the compromises?"_

"_Because you love me"._

My words sounded callous to my ears but it was the truth. I was only doing this for him. I'm content with wallowing in self pity and I know that I have to move on. But I can't go anywhere else. Walford is my home. Syed is my heart, and home is where the heart is right?

I could see him processing it in his mind, weighing up the pros and the cons.

"_What do I get out of it"? _

"_You mean apart from a dashing partner, great sex and a pretty damn good cook if I say so myself"? _

James smiled at me.

"_Yeah, I do" _

"_You get.. a drop down gorgeous partner, fantastic sex and a cook who'd put Gordon Ramsay to shame" _

James grinned at me. Jokes were my way of coping, hiding the layers of hurt that lay deep within me.

The 'jokiness' dropped from my tone.

"_It's your call but I'm just laying the cards on the table now"_

He nodded slowly.

"_I love you Christian and that's never going to change. I don't care if we're here or in New York. I just want to be with you and only you". _

For the first time, I smiled at him properly since he first arrived. I slid across the sofa towards him.

"_In that case – Yes. I will marry you". _


	3. Chapter 3

**Syed's POV:**

"_I'm going to go for a quiet drink in the Vic. Do you want to come?"_

I looked around the room, staring at my wife.

"_I dunno. I'm feeling a bit jet lagged actually and we don't have too long either so I want to get things sorted."_

"_Fair enough. How much do you have left to do?"_

"_Well I still need to unpack and I want to fill mum in with the good news too"_

"_Ok. I'll probably be back later then"_

I leaned across the black suitcase and kissed her lips once.

I waited to feel something.

It never came.

**Christian POV:**

I looked at James, swallowing the lump that was forming in my throat. I now belonged to him. I was married.

That was it. I forced down my emotions as I blocked them out. I couldn't deal with them; all I could deal with was our reception. Was this what Syed felt like on his wedding day? I forced him out of my mind, scared that the overwhelming emotions might force through the cracks of my mask, exposing me.

His hand slipped into mine and I squeezed it once, smiling at him. I'm married. I couldn't believe it.

We were walked into the Vic to sounds of cheers, the mini explosion of party poppers and confetti. I laughed out loud as I saw Roxy tottering towards me.

"_Congratulations Christian"_ Her voice was shrill to my ear as she hugged me.

"_Babe, I can not believe that you're married"_

"_Neither can I, but what's all this"?_ I mock joked with her.

"_Please don't kill me!!! I know you wanted a quiet do, but you're my best mate yeah and I couldn't let this opportunity pass" _

"_Ahh.. fine but I want some alcohol in me now and you owe me one"_

"_Yesss! Nothing but the best for you babe"_

I watched her as she ran off, and I turned towards my sister. It took me several moments to realise that James was still holding my hand.

**Syed's POV:**

As I approached the Vic I could see that there was some kind of celebration going on inside. Music pumped through the walls and laughter echoed out. I smiled to myself as I tried to imagine what it was. Some things never changed. Even though Amira and I had been away for 3 weeks, some things never changed.

I opened the door, and saw crowds of people drinking. I looked around for some sign of the celebration. It was a wedding. I frowned. We'd only been gone 3 weeks and we hadn't heard about anyone getting engaged let alone married. A hush descended on the crowd and they turned in one direction. I edged closer for a look. I felt an ominous feeling in the pit of my stomach. Something felt wrong. Something felt very wrong. I tried to shake the feeling off but I couldn't place it.

**Christian's POV:**

"_Can I just say my beautiful people, thank you for coming. You're the important people in our lives, the ones who count. I promise I'm not drunk just yet but I figured it'd be a good time to do speeches now, while I'm not totally smashed._

_James – I never thought we'd get married and you pushing me to marry you was a great decision. You're my oldest friend and now my husband.. who would have thought? For the first time in my life I'm actually happy!!! I just hope I can make you happy and thank you for being there for me. I knew I could always count on you!! _

I paused..

"_This is getting a bit soppy now so I better stop. But have fun everyone, get pissed on me and James.. and oh yeah I LOVE YOU HUBBY"_

I staggered off the stage to cheers and whistles. Looking up I laughed at Jane who was wiping a tear away from her eye.

"_Oh Jane, sis, it was hardly lovey dovey"_

"_Its just – I never thought I'd see you settled"_

I sobered up slightly at the unintentional double meaning in her words.

"_Neither did I. But hey, miracles happen"_

I felt his hands slip around my waist as I turned to him. I turned around.

"_That was beautiful Christian"_

"_Oh come off it James! It was hardly newsworthy"_

"_No, the fact that you told all these people today just how happy I make you and you know you can always count on me. I won't let you down I promise. I mean it"_

He ducked his head towards me, finding my mouth before I could reply. I tasted his tongue and felt the hardness in his trousers as he pushed his groin against mine. I pulled back, laughing at the wolf whistles around us when I saw him.

He was staring from the other side of the room. My body froze, shocked at the sight of him. I cursed under my breath.

"_I'll be back"_ was all I could say as I pushed my way to the door.

**Syed's POV:**

The cold air hit my face as I stumbled out the Vic. He was married? He had actually got married? The tears filled my eyes and blurred my vision as I made my way towards the Unit. I knew it was empty. I needed to be alone.

My thoughts were bouncing off, each time resurfacing as a new question. As I jabbed my key in the lock, I knew that I only had moments before the thoughts registered in my brain and my heart reacted.

_For the first time in my life I'm actually happy!!! I just hope I can make you happy and thank you for being there for me. I knew I could always count on you!! _

The words were echoing in my brain accompanied with the image of him passionately kissing James. My foot crumpled at the bottom step and I fell to the ground crying. My body was shaking with the force of the sobs. 3 _months _and he'd moved on, got married to another man. Got married to James. I howled on the floor as the tears came out in full force. There was no going back for either one of us. I was trapped in this lie for life. There was no way out. But how could he do that to me? Getting married but then not even TELLING me about it? I banged my fists against the floor, venting out my frustration. I hated him. I could hear him.

"_Sy? Syed I'm sorry"_

"_DON'T CALL ME THAT" _

"_I'm sorry I never meant for you to find out like this"_

"_How could you do this to me Christian?_ My words choked on my sobs.

I felt his arms around me.

"_GET OFF ME. I DON'T WANT YOU TOUCHING ME. I DON'T WANT YOU ANYWHERE NEAR ME"!_

His grip closed on my wrists keeping our bodies parted. I stared at my feet, as my hysteria subsided.

"_Get off me Christian"_ I was heartbroken. I couldn't look at him. I couldn't look at the man who betrayed me.

"_Look at me"_

"_No"_ I shook my head forcefully. To look at him would be to beg, to plead and I just couldn't do that anymore.

With my wrist still trapped in his arm, he lifted his arm and raised my chin with just a finger.

For the first time in 3 weeks, I looked at him. For the first time since the wedding, I looked at him properly. My eyes were transfixed by his face. His eyes staring deep into mine, the creases set. His soft lips were pouted and with every passing moment I drank his face in, knowing that I'd never get this chance again. I didn't realise the tears that were silently falling until I tasted the salt on my lips.

"_How could you"_ I shook my head slowly, never leaving the pathways to his soul.

"_I'm sorry"_ he mouthed at me.

"_No you're not, otherwise you wouldn't have done this to me"_

My breathing was rugged as I tried to control it.

"_I hate you. I hate you so much Christian"._

"_I know you do" _His nod was bittersweet.

"_I hate you for having the control you have over me. I hate you for taking over my life. I hate the way you looked at me. I hate the way I can't stay away from you. I hate you"_

"_Don't say that Sy"_ I looked up away from him, staring at the ceiling. I'm not his 'Sy' anymore. In a twisted way, the pain on his face made my pain bearable.

"_I thought I told you not to call me that"_

Neither of us spoke.

"_Christian, I left you for 3 weeks and I came back to walk in on your reception. How am I supposed to take it? You shouldn't have done this to me. Why didn't you tell me? Didn't I deserve that much? After everything" _

"_You made it clear how you felt when you married Amira"_

"_So what its my fault? I didn't have a CHOICE Christian.. You did" _My voice broke on the last words.

"_I chose you"_

"_I can't be that person you want me to be. You know I can't."_

"_No, you mean you can't be the real you" _

"_Does it even matter anymore? You've moved on. Just go Christian. Leave me to wallow in self pity"_

"_I can't leave you in this state"_

"_It's BECAUSE of you I'm in this state" _I bit my lip trying to control the tears but it was no use. They fell thick and fast. Our eyes never left each other as I stared at him. My words caused him to flinch.

"_You can't expect me to hang onto our memory Syed. I deserve much more than that. I deserve someone I call my partner, someone who isn't ashamed of me"_

"_I was never ashamed of you Christian"_

"_No but you were ashamed of yourself, of your sexuality. Ashamed for what I stood for"_

"_Why are we having this conversation? Just go! Go back to your husband and your party. I don't want you here" _The bitterness in my voice stung him but I no longer cared.

"_Too bad"_

"_Syed.."_

"_Don't bother"_

"_Please just hear me out"_

"_Why should I?"_

"_Because you deserve to know"_

His aquamarine eyes changed, I saw determination within them and I knew there was no point in arguing with him.

"_I understand it was always about your family, community, God. We're two lost souls Sy. Our worlds they just don't fit anymore. You've got your own life with your .. wife and family and I've got mine with .."_

"_Your new husband, James" _I spat the words at him.

"_Yeah.. James"_

The image of Amira and I walking around pushing a pram entered my mind. But then I thought of Christian and James together. I shuddered. I thought of the Mosque, how every day, 5 times a day I prayed. I prayed because it was my religion and it was _me _but this 'truth' in me needed to be realised. It was fighting to get out.

"_Sy, I'm giving you a choice. You can walk away from everything now but you'll have __me __or we can keep on living how we are, unhappy" _

I raised my eyes to his again and saw that he was being serious. Minutes passed between us. The Mosque, my family, God, wife, future children or Christian? Acceptance, respect, honour, dignity or love?

"_You know that I can't do that"_

"_Then you've made your choice Syed" _

He released his grips on my wrists and turned to the staircase. As I watched him go up, I waited until I heard the door close above me.

I staggered into the office and dropped onto the sofa. The pain hit my chest and almost ripped me into two. He'd given me another chance but I'd turned it down. I'd never be able to walk away from everything. I loved him. But I couldn't walk away. I didn't try and fight the sobs as they wracked through my body. I breathed heavily, trying to get oxygen into my lungs as my brain tried to accept that he'd walked away from me. I pummelled the walls until my knuckles were raw from bleeding. The physical pain was minute compared with the anguish in my heart. Only minutes had passed since he left, but already it felt like a lifetime.

**Christian's POV:**

I leaned against the door, trying not to cry. I'd given him a choice but had left him again. I wiped my eyes discreetly, looking around. No body was around. I heard his cry and froze. He was crying again.. oh god he was hysterical. My mind and body instantly wanted to turn to him, comfort him but I knew it would only make my choice harder. I waited a few moments more until I could take it no longer. Quietly I tiptoed down the stairs and looked towards the window. I saw him punching the walls, until eventually he slinked down, shaking. I walked into the room unsure what to do. I couldn't leave him. I walked towards him and his eyes flashed open at me.

"_Cant you just leave me alone" _His voice was hard and I tried to ignore the resentment in his voice.

"_Syed – you're hurting"_

"_Yeah, I am. Because the person who I was supposed to mean the world too has gone and got married. Excuse me for not jumping over the moon."_

"_Even when you cry you manage sarcasm. That's quite an art" _My voice was shaking.

"_Ohhh leave me ALONE_"

"_I wish I could"_ I didn't realise that I had spoken aloud until he half leant against the wall.

"_There's nothing here for you anymore. Just go Christian before we have people looking for us"_

"_Are you sure"?_

"_What part is so hard to understand? Just GO AWAY. I don't NEED you anymore" _

I turned, walking towards the door.

"_Do you know what I hate the most"?_

I didn't turn around.

"_I hate the fact that I ever fell in love with you" _

I then understood. There was nothing there for me anymore.


	4. Chapter 4 Another Choice Taken

**Syed's POV: **

I leaned my head against the window and sighed as I watched the cloud float beneath me. The sunlight streamed through the window, tanning my face. I slammed the blind shut, harder than I intended. I just wanted to get off this plane, and get away from here. Away from her. She stirred under my arm and pulled herself closer to me. I battled the urge to recoil. This is my choice, its my life. I looked at my silver watch. There's still 4 hours of the flight left and I knew that I wouldn't be able to sleep. I practised pushing him out of my mind, excuses.. I practised how I was going to live my lie.

**Christian's POV:**

I removed my headphones and stretched my legs.

"We are now approaching London Heathrow Airport. Please fasten your seatbelts". I tightened my seatbelt as I looked at the tiny pinpricks of light below us, moving along the M4. I was finally coming back home after a 5 day honeymoon in Majorca. It was the only deal we could get at such short notice and James had to be back at work. James mumbled in his sleep. With a heavy heart, I awoke him.

* * *

"_I'm gonna go straight to bed"_

"_I think I might hit the shower and go to the Vic or something"_

He stretched, and his shirt rose up.

"_I'll probably wait till morning"_

"_Lightweight"_

"_Well, its hardly my fault that we didn't get much sleep"_

I smiled to myself. I could hardly argue there.

"_Fine, but SHOWER first. I don't want you stinking out the bed"_

I gently nudged him towards the door, despite his protests. Bad hygiene was a pet hate of mine. We'd been back for 5 minutes and his stuff were already sprawled everywhere. I turned and saw the post. I started working my way through the pile, it was amazing how it built up in 5 days. Halfway through I started flicking through it, I noticed the letter first from the writing. I knew who that would belong to in my sleep. I heard the shower switch off and quickly stuffed the letter into my pocket. I needed to open it privately.

I felt two hands slip around my waist, kisses being planted on my neck. I pulled out of his embrace.

"_Didn't you get enough of me in the last week?"_

"_Not really… ah come on you were up for it 5 minutes ago"_

"_Yeah and that was then. I think I'm feeling a bit jetlagged actually"_

Without another word, I walked to the bathroom, only pausing to grab a clean towel.

With trembling hands, I pulled out the letter. I breathed the envelope in, it even _smelt_ of him. My hands were shaking from the thought of what the letter could contain. I hadn't seen him since James and I had left for Spain because we had flown out the following morning on pre booked tickets. Why would he send me a letter when he could say it to my face?

I stripped down, switched the shower on and sat on the toilet lid. I slit the top of the envelope, careful not to rip it. I placed it on the shelf. Sitting back down quietly, I read the letter, I read it twice before placing it back in the envelope and ripping it into as many pieces I could. I chucked them into the shower and I finally washed myself with the swirling mess of ink and paper at my feet.

* * *

Christian,

I bet you can't understand why I've written you this letter.

There's something you need to know.

By the time you've read this, I should be settling into my new home in the Middle East.

I've left rainy Walford for sunny Dubai.

There's no point in me pretending that I left because of the weather..

The last time I saw you I told you that "I hate that I ever fell in love with you" and by God do I mean it. Ever since I've met you, my life has been trouble. I've completely changed and I don't think I know myself anymore. Yes, I know _what_ I am but I can't be who I am. You need to understand that my religion is predominantly **me**. I can't be the person you want me to be, so I'm leaving. But understand this, you're not the person I think you are. More fool me I guess, for ever thinking you loved me.

We both need to move on with our lives.

This is my choice and its final. What we had, it was fun while it lasted but that's all it ever was.

I never promised you forever.

Syed


	5. Chapter 5

**6 MONTHS LATER – JULY 2010**

**Syed's POV:**

"_A lot's happened in 6 months"_

"_Yeah" …_

"_We're married, we're in Dubai, The Stylo Magazine has really taken off, we've got a gorgeous flat, you've selling properties again…"_ Her voice trailed off, clearly content.

"_And who knows, we might even be a proper family soon too"_

I noticed the slight pinch on her face.

"_Yeah.. I've been thinking about that"_

Amira placed her fork on the table, slowly..

"_What"? _

"_There's no rush is there"?_

"_Amira! We've been over this a million and one times and nothing has changed"_

"_Yeah I know we have but just hear me out" _She reached out and briefly touched my hand.

"_Listen, we're in our mid twenties, our careers are really taking off. Why on earth would we want to have a kid? We're already busy enough as it is. What's a couple more years going to do"?_

"_I just… feel ready"_

"_And this has nothing to do with pressure from your parents"?_

"_Of course not, why on earth would you think that"?_

"_Because I thought we sorted this all out in London. But a couple of months later, we're back to Square 1. I just don't get you anymore Syed. I know it's not you, so it must be your parents. It's hardly our friends here"_

"_I just want a baby, what's wrong with that"?_ We were both fighting to keep our voices down.

"_I don't want a child Syed. Why do you have to keep banging on about it"?_

"_I want us to bring our own creation into this world. I want us to give life to something. Am I asking for too much?"_

To my utmost surprise, she stood up.

"_Where are you going"?_

"_Home"_

"_Oh stop being so over dramatical all the time"_

"_Overdramatical? Ha! That's rich coming from you"_

"_Just sit down and can't we talk about this like civil adults without someone storming off all the time?"_

"_No. Its fine you just do whatever you want. You always do"_

"_And what's that supposed to mean"?_

"_It means… do what the hell you want Syed Masood."_

I watched her storm out of the restaurant. With a sigh I turned back to find a room full of people watching us. I couldn't believe her. I had no urge to go after her. We'd only end up arguing again. I raised my hand, signalling to the waiter. With a curt nod, he delivered the bill.

* * *

**Christian's POV:**

"_And do you remember that time when Bobby puked straight into Lucy's mouth"_

"_Urgh, don't remind me"_

I joined in with the laughter.

"_Yeah and she wouldn't do near him for a week"_

"_Try a month. I smelt like baby food for ages"_

The laughter died down, everyone sighing blissfully at the memories.. I was around at Ian and Jane's for dinner. James was working late again. Another memory struck me.

"_Who remembers that time Lucy tried to sneak 5 of her friends out the back window only two of them tried to get through at the same time but ended up getting stuck and broke …"_

I noticed the look on Lucy's face. Oops, I guess I wasn't meant to say anything. I always assumed Ian had found out…

"_Finish what were you saying Christian"_

"_Nah its fine dad"_

"_I knew it was one of your friends who'd broken the mirror, I specifically told you…"_

"_Thanks a lot Uncle" _Lucy quietly said in a half whisper.

"_Sorry Luce, I wasn't to know"_

James chose that exact moment to make his precise entrance, brandishing a piece of paper.

"_Guess what! Guess what Christian"_

I looked up at him slightly dazed.

"_Sorry"?_

"_Just guess. The most amazing thing ever has happened"_

"_What's that" _I racked my brains but couldn't remember if we'd been expecting news.

"_Someone guess"_ He looked around excited.

"_You've got promoted" said Ian_

"_No"_

_You're moving" guessed Jane_

"_No" _

"_You're finally going to shave that beard off"_

"_N- what"?_

I couldn't help snickering but immediately regretted it when I saw his crestfallen face.

"_Oh leave him alone Lucy. I think he looks like George Clooney"_

"_Yeah .. more like a cheap rip off version"_

"_Are you actually going to tell us what's going on or do we have to hang around all day guessing"?_

"_Yeah Peter's right babe. What's the good news"?_

"_We're officially prospective parents"_

I allowed his words to sink in, hardly daring to look at him.

"_You mean…"_ A smile crept onto my face, while James eagerly nodded.

"_Yes… We've made it onto the shortlist"._

"_Ohmygosh! That's fantastic James"_

I jumped up hugging him tightly, cheering with the others.

"_Oh I can't believe this, Ian run out and buy a bottle of red wine. Not the cheap stuff either. We need to celebrate this. Oh.. I'm so pleased for you both"_

Still hugging him, I looked around at my family. Their jubilant faces were enlightening.

"_Is that even legal"?_

I pulled back from James in time to see Jane lightly smacking Ian on the arm.

"_Of course it's legal"_

"_Oh .. ok"_

"_Yes Ian, gay men can even get married now"_ I casually said, sarcasm dripping from my voice.

"_It's called living in the 21__st__ century dad"_

"_Alright alright! Don't attack me! I was just asking a question"_

"_So what about that wine"?_

"_None for you young lady. Bed."_

"_Not even to celebrate my favourite uncle's good news"?_

"_You're only uncle you mean"_ I pulled her into an embrace.

"_Exactly"_

"_Congratulations.. both of you. Lucy, Peter, you can stay up for a few more hours."_

"_Thank you" _

"_I'm just off to the Minute Mart, won't be back in a tick"_

"_And seeing as we're having a late one, I might as well put Bobby to bed"_

I turned to James again, smiling at him. His arm was still around my waist, mine casually resting on his shoulders. _"You're amazing"_ I mouthed to him_. "I know"_ he mouthed back. He pulled me in for a kiss…

There was a small cough behind us.

We turned to see Peter awkwardly looking around the room.

"_It's alright Peter. We're done"_ I said, cheekily grinning at James.

"_For now"_ he whispered with a smirk so only I could hear.

**Syed's POV:**

I dangled my legs over the wall, staring out into the blackened night. I could taste the salty water. The air was breezy, the night was calm. I stared back into the sky, watching the luminous moon and twinkling stars. I imagined what it would be like to see the world from that height? Would everything be black and white? Or would there be too many details? Was the bigger picture, the right picture or did the smaller pictures hold more significance? I felt anger which was directed at myself. Why was life so complicated? My thoughts went back to Amira.. She had a cheek bringing my parents into it, they only wanted what's best for me. That's hardly a crime is it? Wanting what's best for your child? I looked around, no one was sitting near me. The corniche looked out onto The Arabian Gulf Sea. The flat where Amira and I lived was literally a 5 minute walk away. I often sat down here and used to think about everything. It'd become my safe haven in the last 6 months. Sometimes I'd lie back, close my eyes and imagine a different life. Nobody really came down this side, many preferring the beach underneath them, where kids often played. The minority preferred nothing but the rocks. I simply came here for the peace and quiet.

I thought back to the first time I met Ash.

"_Is anyone sitting here"?_

_I'd looked around startled and saw a tanned, chiselled man standing in front of me. _

"_Um.. no"_

"_Mind if I sit down"?_

"_Your choice."_

"_Thanks". _

_He'd sat down next to me without another word. I'd studied his profile from the corner of my eyes, using the dim glow from the streetlight. He had black hair, thick eyelashes, a slightly crooked nose, ..and nice lips too I couldn't help but notice. His muscles were clear to see through his white shirt which had the top button unbuttoned. The rest of his outfit was simple, black trousers and shoes. _

_Neither of us spoke that evening except to bid each other goodnight. But it soon became our ritual to meet at the same spot every few evenings.. He was now my closest friend in Dubai. Over time, I gained his trust and told him about my family, some of my life back in Walford and he told me about how his parents were dead and he had no contact with any of his family. He also happened to live in East London too, but in Stratford area. _

Almost as if I conjured him up, he appeared. Swinging my legs around, I hugged him, smiling as I saw him.

"_Ash, where've you been lately? I haven't heard from you for ages"_

"_Yeah sorry, I had to fly back to London"_

"_Is everything okay"?_

He rubbed his hands on the back of his neck, a sign that he was nervous.

"_Not really"?_

We both went to sit down, neither of us speaking. I didn't mind because I knew he'd tell me when he was ready.

"_I might move back to London"_

"_Any particular reason why"?_

"_Dubai is no longer the future Syed"_

"_What do you mean"?_

"_I mean.. you should start investing elsewhere"_

I nodded slowly.

"_Dubai is only an island, its sinking in every sense of the word. You have a choice. Either jump ship now and try and swim to shore…"_

"_Or" _I asked even though I knew the answer already.

"_Or get dragged down with it"_

I nodded slowly for the second time.

"_The evidence is all around us. Flailing stock market, money shortages, lack of investment, too many developments, lack of time…" _

"_I went back to London to start transferring the business there._

"_Just London"?_

"_Spain's back on a steady high again, so I've been looking for opportunities there too"_

"_Property development"?_

"_Yeah"_

"_What's the rate like"?_

"_The Pound is gaining strength, it's the perfect time to strike"_

"_While the iron's hot and all that"?_

"_Exactly…."_

"_Property development is my area of expertise.. I used to do that before I was a caterer"_

"_Really"?_

"_Hmm hmm.."_

"_How would you feel if I asked you to come into business with me"?_

"_I'd have to think about it… see if it's worth sticking it out here first"_

Ash nodded thoughtfully.

"_Fair enough.. I need an answer soon though"_

We fell into a silence.

"_What about you"?_

"_Sorry"?_

"_I saw you looking at the stars again… problems with the wife again"?_

I groaned.

"_That bad, eh?"_

I only managed a grimace in return.


End file.
